What has given me the most strength in my life comes not from a moment of greatness, but from a moment when I was at my weakest.  It came when my father passed away.  The death of my father in March of 2007 had an incredibly profound effect on my life in all areas.  At first, I felt weak in the knees from the devastating loss I felt, but as the year progressed, I would find moments when an inner strength was evolving within me that both moved me and grounded me at the same time.  I felt immense courage to be myself in all the relationships of my life, including the one with myself!  And the journey continues, as I still find many times, when I need to find strength from within myself, I just think of my father, his love and his laughter, and there emerges from within me a strength that not only helps me to stand but gives me the courage to walk forward.  How I miss my father, but he continues to give me gifts from his seat in Heaven.  I will always miss him, but am so grateful for what he gave me both in his living and in his passing.  

Money used to be a friend that treated me to lavish extravagances.  We used to travel in style, carelessly risking all for a moment of pleasure and excitement received from the "things" I bought.  That was then ... I was gainfully employed, had a sense of security, and even had a savings account.  After being let go from my position over a year ago, my relationship with money has changed dramatically.  My relationship to money is that of a husband and wife who have spent the good times together, and now have to rally to get through a tough time.  We have to work at our relationship.  We have great respect for each other, knowing what our limitations are yet recognizing our needs and desires.  I am grateful for the money that is in my life, and I respect it more than I ever have.  I used money in the past to comfort me when I was down, giving me what I realize now was a false sense of joy and strength.  Today, money and I are on the same page.  My relationship with money has shifted greatly and today  I consider money to be a blessing gifted to me to use with great thought and care.  I don't take money for granted anymore. I treat myself these days to moments and experiences, instead of things!  And as a result, I feel abundant beyond my wildest imagination!

"Sit down and be quiet.
You are drunk, and this is the
edge of the roof."
~ Rumi

Over the past years, I've been on a journey of self-discovery and spirituality that has helped me to grow but  my life remains out of balance with my lifestyle.  I'm stuck in bad habits and a very complacent lifestyle that isn't in balance with my personal growth.  My life will be more balanced as I create experiences that include more quality time with friends and family or becoming engaged in activities that are more reflective of the things that give me true joy and help me move forward.

"Life is like riding a bicycle.  To keep your balance you must keep moving".  ~ Albert Einstein